<body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/plusone.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar.g?targetBlogID\x3d966836777301214879\x26blogName\x3d%2B+_+My+.+%5BA%5Drtificial+.+Fairytale+_+%2B\x26publishMode\x3dPUBLISH_MODE_BLOGSPOT\x26navbarType\x3dBLUE\x26layoutType\x3dCLASSIC\x26searchRoot\x3dhttps://vehementdesire.blogspot.com/search\x26blogLocale\x3den_US\x26v\x3d2\x26homepageUrl\x3dhttp://vehementdesire.blogspot.com/\x26vt\x3d4520796618488338168', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe" }); } }); </script>
Jul 30, 2010:Updated. Just another Friday.

♥LaLa Land™

Dear diary,, Fri-dayy *30o71o* .

between scary and horror movies.

4th period mystery
Death bell
thought it was a ghost story. It is..
but turns out it's more to a psychopathic killer kind of thing.

internal performance after school..
it went well but i screwed some parts.
ugh! having lack of instruments to prac is so frustrating.

looking forward to whatever that comes my way..

ohh dear. ♥



SyidahAinVeeJr.; 4:00 PM

Jul 29, 2010:had to post this. couldn't help it.

♥LaLa Land™

Dear diary,, Thur-dayy *29o71o* .

Thank you Ronny.
Thank you.
So very much.

for spamming me and Jerome's Fb and
making me look like i'm an idiot talking to myself.
haha! arse. finding ways to kill you.
soon.. six feet under.
hahahaha! crazy fcuk.

running around turning TRCC upside down.

too close. ♥


Labels: ,

SyidahAinVeeJr.; 7:56 PM

:Updated. the light.. haha!

♥LaLa Land™

Dear diary,, Thur-dayy *29o71o* .

Slowly losing control..
can’t find my way out of dreams and into reality..

These days.. it’s been too easy to get into day dreams.
Even more so difficult to get out.
Staring into blank space..
the thoughts I have not just in my mind but in front of my eyes..
Images so vivid and clear my head gets numb each time I get pulled into my play land.
I SWEAR it isn’t a good thing.
When my head thinks too much and I get stuck in a daze too frequently.

Like yesterday where I almost got hit by a motorcycle.
Hahahaha! *sure I’m laughing now..*

Suriah was so shocked she just shouted my name but couldn’t move.
Her legs were planted on the pavement.

I think one day I might die from a car accident.
Unless I can stop spacing out..
it’s like my soul is having an out of body experience.
Like the ribbons tying it to my body is not tied on properly..

And ohh gosh my health.
WHAT THE FUCK is going on?!
Everything aches at the most random of times..
Lost control of my body before band prac in the practice rooms..
it just went numb and I could only regain control after awhile..
gritted my teeth and was thinking
|“fcuk, not now.. not again..”|
haha. FML.

I remember a time I used to love running and SOCCER!
Oh yeah~ running around on the fields with my friends..
or street soccer on the cool pavements under the void decks..
but ever since secondary school
and the 1st time I lost control of myself while running for PE
I started to despise the very thought..
my limbs feeling so loose like I swallowed some drug and can’t stop moving..
grinning like a fool..
the muscles I can’t fcuking control.
I HATE this feeling..
it’s despicable.

Mum says it’s because of my lack of blood cells..
till the day I get the full body check up I’ve been meaning to get
4 years ago and have yet to till now.. ughh.

hahaha.. i'm an idiot. ♥
an out of control fool.



SyidahAinVeeJr.; 12:42 PM

Jul 28, 2010:updated. hahahahahahahahah. haha. hah. haishh.. im going nuts.

♥LaLa Land™

Dear diary,, Wed-dayy *28o71o* .

Cognitive. haha!
Fishing Fundamentals.

Classmate dead set on Farming. haha!
Can't imagine someone who talks so classy like him
to live in a rural environment.

band prac after school again.. yay!

Yaya gonna blanja me dinner at Al-Azhar later~
belated bdayy dinner!
gonna play the ♥grand piano at the chambers again!

crazy people on Fb.

"jack of all trades, master of none."-feeling this.
i think we're all too close..

hah. haha. hah. haishh.. ♥



SyidahAinVeeJr.; 11:10 AM

Jul 27, 2010:Updated. Replugio-fied.

♥LaLa Land™
replug on theNewPaper
*i know i look like #$%^&*
huhu! hubby! LOL!

Dear diary,, Tues-dayy *26o71o* .

boo. haha. tedious, crappy, redundant work.

i like it this way..
everything is..
easier. =X haha!
anyway.. band prac after school.. hmm.
Zee changed the dynamics..
wonder how that'll work out for us.
all the best! x3

yesterday was effing hillarious! ♥
the FatBoys connection.
Dilly & Zee Acting like soldiers. ahaha!
can't wait till they upload the vids!~

been awhile. ♥



SyidahAinVeeJr.; 1:53 PM

Jul 26, 2010:Updated. The weekends are over.

♥LaLa Land™

Dear diary,, Mon-dayy *25o71o* .

group reassignment.
Rainy mondays and effing long queues.

too long a story.
SezairiSezalli LIVE.

no pics but hillarious.
long story. haha!
PaSir Ris~

weekends was crazy.
going around Singapore.

knives!! nyahaha~

haha.. mum woke me up to say DaDa called.
at 7.4o+ am. Checked my phone.. 8 missed calls.
She called me again. Picked up.
DaDa: "you just woke up?? HURRY UP AND GET READY!!"
Me: "okay2.." *hangs up phone*
"in a couple of mins.. =_= zZz"
-Zai called-
Me: "ohh fcuk okay im up! im up."

aww.. DaDa went out early in the morn to find cake.
wanted to buy the medium sized cake but they were sold out. =(
ended up just getting the small cakes. haha!

sweet darlings.. ♥

visited nostalgia.. <3
After going everywhere..
went Tampines till night~

want. ♥

yeah. haha. ♥



SyidahAinVeeJr.; 10:09 AM

Jul 23, 2010:Updated. Friday wasn't meant to be like this..

♥LaLa Land™
Dear diary,, Fri-dayy *23o71o* .

i hate fights..

early in the morn..
why bother sending me to sch if you're gonna try to make me cry.
oh wait.
i answered my Q.
it's ok that you can't remember any happy memories.
it's ok that you think all i'm doing is destroying my life.
it's ok.. i am.

funny how i can remember all the good times
but you can't.
you can't. you filter.

and you..
okay.. fresh start? =3

back to reality~ must smile..
today imma go clarke quay~ leaving class early.
will be there till night and i think i know who imma catch a ride home with. ♥

won't be online for a while.. and rJ extended till mondaaay~ x3

exhausted. ♥


Labels: ,

SyidahAinVeeJr.; 8:38 AM

Jul 22, 2010:if you think it's for you. friendship really is.. burdensome.

♥LaLa Land™
Dear diary,, Wed-dayy *21o71o* .


why the heck do i feel so exhausted these days..?
losing too much energy.
being happy, jumpy and high is getting harder now.
if i don't i'll be spoiling the mood for everyone.

just because I don't say anything doesn't mean I'm oblivious.
when you don't favor one.
i see through your facade all these years..
there are things you aren't ok with but you won't bother pointing out directly.
you don't hate me but you don't like my high.
you don't like my emo.
what am i supposed to do?
it's me sincerely. I can't change that.
being emoshytt might be burdensome so i'll not trouble you guys with it.
but high is one thing i can't bear to erase. it keeps me smiling..
at least for a little while..

it's ok. i know what i'm worth.
i know what i'm worth. ♥


Labels: ,

SyidahAinVeeJr.; 8:49 PM

Jul 21, 2010:*continuation* of today..

♥LaLa Land™

Dear diary,, Wed-dayy *21o71o* .


band prac went well today.
figured out the whole structure of the song in only
a couple of hours.
great~ we just need to tighten it a lil bit more..
my day got a tad more brighter with all the crazy darlings..
thank you for the wishes..
though honestly it's nothing to celebrate.
sad life.. had to cancel plans to practice..
but i chose this path. no regrets.

singing that lame old happy blahday in the practice rm.
singing summor in the elevator.
singing again everytime someone else comes.=_=||
but my mind is still not able to enjoy this sweetness fully.
i've still got this bitter taste from that
bittersweet candy on my tongue..
goshh it's been years. if there was a proper goodbye.
it's like the movie "without a trace"
or "jumanji" haha..

random thought.. we all type
"haha" & "LoL" & "ROFM"
(roll on floor meow-ing)
but EVERYONE knows we're not really at least 97% of the time.

ok back to earth!

won't be online anymore at night..
huhu~ x3

can you tell how i'm feeling.. ♥
sometimes typing down words can be fictitious.


Labels: ,

SyidahAinVeeJr.; 8:22 PM

:Today.. Loads on my mind.

♥LaLa Land™

Dear diary,, Wed-dayy *21o71o* .


imma blast my songs to the maximum & be stuck in my own world.
stuck trying to forget what happened today a few years ago..
not productive in class at all..
no.. it isn't the weather..

stay, can't stay.
go, won't go.
*sigh*.. you.

not today. never today.
i've got too much on my mind already..

& i wish i could see you.. ♥
maybe i'd pay a visit later..

here's where my soul is at right now.
halfway there where you are..


Labels: , ,

SyidahAinVeeJr.; 10:25 AM

Jul 20, 2010:Updated.

♥LaLa Land™
genetics.. she has the best combi.

Dear diary,, Tues-dayy *20o71o* .

*sigh* Science

Fasting. wee.
Band Prac & photoshot with replugio for the newspaper after sch. yay. =X
Currently in Science lesson learning about the Dominance of Freakin' Genes.

i've been talking too much so..
done. ♥



SyidahAinVeeJr.; 10:10 AM

Jul 19, 2010:Classy.. =3

♥LaLa Land™

Dear diary,, Mon-dayy *19o71o* .

continuation with today's activity updates.
Topic for formal class today?

Yes. big boss*faci* approved.
A cat went for a job interview.

today i've learnt that suits,
jackets & shoulder pads does things to a girl.
More mature, confident.. Lady boss. ;)
my classmate.
Surprised me.. her potential.

After school followed Nisa & Auda for their "secret prayer place"
.omg the place was charming. Like being in an attic.
So pretty..

ate cookies. omnyom nyom!~

Currently at Insyirah's house listening in
& kpo-ing on their band prac
since my house is only a few blocks away.
1st time I reached ChoaChuKang this early after a long time..
We rode the cab. =D Ronnie pay 1st.

Jerome CUTE!
"I'm gonna make this blue bear feel loved"
(to the blue bear sittin' on Insyirah's bed.)

i reckon imma leave the band to prac alone soon.
& classmates were looking smexy today..♥
especially the rare ones..
dressed to impress.

ok at home now.
guys at our void deck getting on my nerves.
i suddenly have this temptation to rollerblade.
been a while.. but it's gonna rain..
maybe tonight.♥


Labels: , , ,

SyidahAinVeeJr.; 6:54 PM

:Life that overlaps.

♥LaLa Land™

Dear diary,, Mon-dayy *19o71o* .

formal today.
glad i didn't go with the heels.

yesterday.. went out late.. went home late.
Missed Panda's gig. Sad-ed.
worse.. he rubbed it in. He sang.O.o||
i missed.. THAT! aww man~

anyway.. everyone knows i'm random.
& that when i'm alone too many thoughts run through my mind.
it's been a while since i've written these stuff down.

so i've been wondering a lot about the people around me lately..
How were they like before i met them? When they were kids.
SoMeOnE said Naive & Stupid.

i said "that.. & cute."
but i mean seriously.. Singapore is so small.
SoMeOnE's response: "im feeling very rimas by the fact that sg is puny"
translation: he's not delighted bout it.
i'm sure there must've been days where i walked pass a couple of those people.

i wonder what i would do if at the time..
i knew that i'd meet those people again in the future.
"see you around" i guess i'll mutter to myself.
or maybe.. "i wanna give you a hug before anything happens."

when i look at kids.. infants.. i wonders..
"what will this one see in his/her lifetime..?"
"i hope you'll grow up fine.. happy.. out of trouble.."

always this thing where our timelines are of different largely-varied lengths..
the clocks of life are usually overlapped but not shared.
different timings for entrance..
& different for exits..

why the sudden burst in topic?

things just got me thinking..
or have i already..



SyidahAinVeeJr.; 1:43 PM

♫|Nostalgia| |Melancholy|♪